Monday, May 31, 2010

OYW: Super easy! If you're not retarded like I am.

Hey Donk,

You might say I wasn't exactly in the right frame of mind to be working on this project at the exact moment I chose to do so, since I'd been out working in the suddenly steamy hot garden all morning and had exhausted my patience on the cucumber cages I was creating from scavenged chicken wire (WHY SO POINTY?), but I had determined that Sunday was going to be the day I tackled one of our two projects for this month, so obviously I had no choice but to bite the bullet and go ahead with it.

Because you know how I am with a schedule.

But that lack of patience combined with the reintroduction to sweat on my brow was the perfect storm of no-nos that resulted in the first 30 minutes of my experience with this pattern to be, let's say, less than ideal.

This poor top came into the world amidst a sea of swears.

Because me, oh stupid get off the phone when you're starting a sewing project ME, spent half an hour hunting through all four of the pattern sheets looking for the skirt pattern piece and swearing up a frenzied blue storm while on the phone with my mother before realizing that OH there is no pattern piece for the skirt part of this pattern because oh right there it says to cut two pieces 21x26x17 in a trapezoid shape or something equally simple and not warranting new swears.


So, sometimes I can be dumb and mildly heat-stroked and just not be able to make rational thought happen.

Sorry, mom, that you had to hear me berate everything from the book to my sewing machine to The World We Live In and so on because I'm too stupid to read through the pattern while not also doing 60 other things at once so that I could absorb the pattern's message which was: There aren't pattern pieces for the skirt, just easy measurements.

She's a patient one, me mum.

ANYWAY. Once I got done being a psycho, hung up with my mom (again, sorry mom, I totally ruined our Sunday call. Happy Long Weekend! Enjoy bbqing tomorrow!) and restarted my brain with the help of some freshly brewed sun tea (yay for sun! And caffeine.) - this super cute project took me all of an hour to finish.

And I really like the result. Which sort of surprised me since I figured I'd:

A. Look like I was wearing a trash bag.
B. Feel like I was going to loose a boob out of the front or side while wearing it.
C. Look like I was wearing a trash bag.

I'm sure you can see why I was afraid of boob popage.

I mean, yes, the pattern is very cute and I was sure it was *one of those* patterns that looks good on super small people with conveniently compact boobage, but I was pretty sure that since I don't fit that description it was going to look like a trash bag or a poorly constructed boob bag and it would maybe take some special alteration to make work.

Did not!

What? You thought I was going to model it as a nightie? Don't be porny.

This was the first shot out of the cannon and I really like it.

Plus, I got to use some of that Heather Bailey fabric that has been haunting me ever since last summer's multiple failed attempts at that muther effing sundress with The Devil's Elastic Thread that caused me to create a sundress fit for a four year old (Hi, Emma! I hope you like your dress!) rather than a 31 year old woman like myself.

How a pattern can turn an adult sized dress into one fit for a small child with just the misuse (on my part) of elastic thread is a physical conundrum with which I still haven't been able to come to terms.

But I got to use this fabric which I love with a fiery passion and then YAY also got to use up the rest of my tiny elastic and some random bias tape I had lurking in the sewing box.

Oh, by the way, this pattern takes all 3 1/2 yards of the bias tape it calls for so don't get all, weeee let's just not pay attention and trim off ends all mamby pamby because whoopsy you may get 90% of the hem sewn on and run out and have to finish up with some other bias tape that's not the same color.

Just saying.

Beyond that, though, super easy. Directions made sense. All pattern pieces were included, despite my initial assumptions. Final result is cute, flattering and will make a very nice nightie or tank top (over another tank top and with jeans) once I wash the starchiness out of that fabric because, yes, I'm one of those people who still doesn't wash fabric before sewing with it because I'm lazy.

Hey, you knew this.



  1. Cute top! Alas, this is one in the book to which I had to give a pass (wooo grammar!)...

    That shirt will not contain my enormoboobs.

    At least not without my bra showing or some sort of Coco-esque cleavage, which would only snap the straps in what would later be remembered as "that unfortunate incident where the waiter lost an eye".

  2. I LOVE reading your blog posts. You say EXACTLY what I am thinking, and I crack up every time. BTW, I love the summer nighty!! You did an amazing job, and I really don't see any "boob popage" happening. Looks great!! I think I will mahe myself one today.....not for a nighty though. I am more of a tank kind of girl!!

  3. Cute top- I'm glad that the sundress fabric didn't laugh at you when it realized you were attempting another piece of clothing. Because unlike your virtual Garmin bitch...I don't think the fabric would be as fun taunting you.

  4. Yours looks so cute on you! I saved most of my swears for when I thought I was all done only to put it on and find that I hate the way it looks on me. I've probably been brainwashed by too many episodes of What Not to Wear and their insistence on fitted clothing so I couldn't stand how baggy and shapeless it looked on me. I think with this pattern your extra boobage probably helps make it work. Alas, I am not so blessed in that area. At least it was a pretty easy pattern to whip up.

  5. Yay! See, sometimes swears help the final product. I made the pintucked top instead of the nightie because of the very same boobage issues. I might have to make it now, as I *heart* bias tape!! I never knew it until now--there was yummy vintage bias tape lurking in my sewing room, but I refused to get all tangled in it folds and....I was scared. But now I see the light! I followed the directions EXACTLY and it came out
    right. Crazy.
    I would recommend using tracing paper and a tracing wheel for the pintucks, so that you don't get to the sewing machine and not be able to find your pintuck marks and then hyperventilate because you JUST spent twenty minutes marking the damn fiddly things and where did they go????!!!! And then realizing the chintzy backup method you used GETS ERASED BY THE IRON. Dammit. But I didn't have to use my seam ripper once (the little slut is always just waiting at my elbow while I sew).
    And I said more swears while trying to get the bias tape to do a reverse half-twist double camel around the v-shaped armpit area, then realized later I could have just sewn the bias tape to the flat pieces before I sewed them together. Cause really? Am I going to be flashing so much pittage to anyone who would care, like "Oh, she made the bias tape go all AROUND the raw edge instead of sewing it in. Wow." And we all know I only sew to impress other people...
    So great book choice, too! I made the sundress as well, and might actually buy it instead of checking it out from the library. And I feel sorry for the next person who checks it out with the pattern pieces all wonky from being used by me. Thanks for the great idea, Finny!!

  6. Very nice--pretty fabric and no boobs on display. What more could you ask for?

    Speaking of boobs popping out, I must sometime describe my ordeal of trying to find an appropriate outfit for a funeral that did not display my excessive-thanks-to-the-baby cleavage in a manner totally inappropriate for a religious service. I only partially succeeded.

  7. You were awarded the Sunshine Award on my blog! Check it out and come claim it! :) Thanks for blogging! Keep up the great work!

  8. well, hot damn. i'm making me some new jammies. love.

  9. It's wonderful and I love how you used the fabric. I'm worried about the boobage factor for me, too, but yours looks so great maybe I'll give it a go as a nightie first to work up my courage.

  10. Amazing job.! I love the top and your blog. I think I will be making this soon.

  11. I just found your blog, and you had me cracking up the whole time I was reading this! "boob popage", "compact boobage" "mamby pamby" serisouly, you are hysterical!

    I just added you to my blog reader, can't wait to read more!

    I have the OYW books too, and you just inspired me to add this nightie to my list of projects - and bumped it to the top, too!

  12. curegirl - Your grammar makes me weak in the knees. Please, come back and comment more. :)

    Leigh - I'm thinking this would make an excellent tank, but with a tank underneath. I'd be way too worried about boob popage.

    Sara - Dude. This friggen fabric. It's the fabric I hate to love. Thankfully it's been made into something I can actually wear now and it can stop haunting me.

    Sourkraut- Oh boo. See, I feel like the fashion world is shoving all this loose paper bag-ish stuff at us which I can't wear because HI - I NEED A WAIST LINE otherwise I look like a house. So, in this case, the drape of the pattern works out. A-Line works for the bustier of us girls.

    okgirl - You're awesome and I think we're kindred sewing spirits. I will definitely try the tracing paper/wheel scenario for the other tank - in the event that I can locate such things. Do they live at Joanne or should I order them online?

    Do you have a blog? I need to see this sundress, too. I'm thinking of making it (from that same fabric because I want to live in it), but am still unsure about the fit/length.

    Kris - Um, please describe. That can only be hilarious.

    HayMarket8- Thank you! That is probably the only time someone has associated my sourpuss with sunshine, so I'll take it! Please come back and say more nice things.

    Kelli - Seriously.

    I'll be making more of these tops to wear over other tank tops and out in public. Cute, fast and all I need is more elastic and bias tape.


    Finally a project from this book that doesn't confound me. In the end, anyway.

    Junie - Definitely!

    Now that I've made one, I think I'll make a few more to wear with tank tops underneath and then out in public.

    The nightie one...well...even with the boobage factor, it's still acceptable in the boudoir, IYKWIM ;)

    Romona - Add it to the flickr pool when you do. Would love to see it!

    Katie - Ooh, the coveted top spot on the To-Sew list! Can't wait to see it in the pool!


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Look at you commenting, that's fun.

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Sucks, right?

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