Monday, October 06, 2008


Yes, that is a PR right there folks.

A PR that is 10+ minutes faster than last year's Rock N Roll Half WOO!

Now, I realize it's no super sprinter time or anything, but I did finish with the top half of the female participants and also IMPORTANT! did not die or make a shameful pile of myself.

Had I been wearing American flag shorts, an orange State Corrections jumper or been a barefoot stripper - then we may have been worried about shame, but thankfully there were others taking care of that for me.

See, folks, not everyone seems to be running this race for a PR or for the pride of finishing. No, it would appear that some people run this race to be ridiculous. Some people set out their running clothes the night before and instead of choosing the boring black Nike shorts like someone (me), they choose shorts cut from the cloth of Old Glory. And then they run around throwing peace signs while also slapping hands with the spectators wearing McCain/Palin Tshirts and not at all seeing the irony in it.

Some people run in full costume, as though running a half marathon weren't uncomfortable and distressing enough. They pull on a full length long-sleeve safety orange State Corrections jumper and dirty blond wig and go around screaming "I didn't do it!" a la Richard Kimball.

And then there are people, some might call them strippers, who forgo almost all running attire, traditional or costume, and choose to run in the smallest spandex shorts seen in the light of day and then no shoes at all. And then these people tie their hair up in a very high ponytail and run at an annoyingly quick pace right in front of me for the whole 13.1 miles cheering on everyone as their feet slap the pavement in rhythm with their heaving sports bra.

I did a lot of hoping that she'd take a break along the way so that I could put some distance between myself and the slapping of her bare feet on the pavement, but alas, she never required a break. And that is when I became entirely appreciative of my decision to run with the iPod this year.

See, last year, I was all oh, well they say real runners don't wear headphones when they race so I won't either and then I had to endure the not good bands every mile and listen to people talk on cell phones or have strained pointless conversations with their running buddies until I was about to burst with annoyance.

And I was not willing to do that again this year. I wanted to run and try to enjoy myself and not have homicidal thoughts as I was rounding mile 12 and that turned out to be a very good decision indeed.

When I rounded mile 12 yesterday, with Bubba and the dog cheering me on, instead of being ON FIRE WITH HATRED FOR THOSE AROUND ME, I was having a very satisfying realization: I was going for a PR.

My watch was a bit behind gun time, thanks to the half mile between my corral and the starting line, so when my watch read 2:16:somethinrother, I knew I was going to get to the finish line WAY ahead of last year's time of 2:35:28.

So, between the wagging dog, the cheering Bubba, the time on my watch and the short distance between myself at mile 12 and the finish line at mile 13.1, I used all the juice I had left (not a lot) to pull myself together for a respectable last mile. Which was increasingly difficult given the cement coursing through my thighs.

And then I shoved my headphones into my waist pocket and fled for that finish line like I'd be racing like a real runner the whole way. Because even if my time doesn't show it - the finish line photos might - Look! A real runner! She's not wearing headphones! My vanity knows no limits, folks.


Real runners probably don't go have Race Fries and then nap through half a 49ers game on their couch BUT WHO CARES because it was the best afternoon ever. Especially after I took some Tylenol Extra and remembered I didn't have to run at all this week.



  1. Congrats on the PR! I have enjoyed reading your blog, especially the running related items.
    amy dot schlotthauer at gmail dot come

  2. Yay, Finny!

    The idea of my loved ones cheering at the finish line is almost enough to make me want to start running again (I did cross country in high school), but I'm not sure my old knees could handle it.

    And I did not eat french fries once this weekend, in your honor.

  3. Congratulations! A PR ROCKS!
    PS. You should get a running skirt. I love mine. It works for swimming too and is tres cool.

  4. Look at you! That is just fantastic -- FANTASTIC!

  5. I like the picture of you and the guy behind you with the paper bag on his head. I don't understand the desire to run AT ALL, but congrats!

  6. Woo f-n hoo! You rock (and roll) girl! Congratulations on the PR, on looking beautiful even after running 2+ hours, and on your tremendous accomplishment.

    At the risk of sounding condescending, I'm so proud of you!

  7. I am totally distracted from the Woo-hoos! that you finished by the fact that you look like that AFTER you run. I officially hate you. Or love you. I can't decide. All I know is that after running a mere 3 miles, I look like something the cat barfed up and the dog then ate and THEN shat.

  8. Congrats! I was just eye-balling my running shoes, thinking I don't want to go running today, and you've totally inspired me! Good job, great timing!


  9. Congrats!!!! WooHOO on that PR!!!!

  10. YAY! for Finny. You are my hero!

  11. Congrats!
    Bet you can't wait for next year! lol

  12. Very excited about this, very excited indeed! Especially considering that nearly all my physical activity at this point is coming vicariously through you. So, hey, thanks for my new PR! Loving that. Feeling healthier by the second!

    On a totally unrelated note, are you aware that your love for 10 inspired my new hobby, none other than becoming a home bartender? Yes, indeed. Does drinking a cocktail every night make me a candidate for AA? Hope not. I have a bottle of 10 waiting for you here. Get yo PR butt over here ASAP so we can celebrate appropriataely.

  13. Congratulations! And if wolfing down fries and passing out after a race is wrong, then I don't want to be right.

  14. Congrats to you!!! It sounds like you really earned those race fries!

  15. Congrats! Way to go! I'm totally impressed and awed. Also, race fries rock!

  16. holy crap. I'm exhausted after your run. Great Job!

  17. Woohoo WTG!!

    I can't believe someone ran it barefoot.


  18. Congrats! PRs are a wonderful thing.

    Couldn't miss the orange guy - besides the jumpsuit he was TALL.

    Enjoy that Saturday non run!

  19. Woo hoo! Great job, girl!!

  20. Well, that's fantastic. And a good read. Congrats! And, isn't dog and husband cheering at a race the greatest?

    When I ran the San Diego Rock n' Roll marathon a few years ago, this dud ran it backwards. He passed me at mile eight. He kicked my ass.

  21. Funny that I wrote dud to describe backwards guy. I meant to write dude but dud is so much better.

  22. Congratulations, Jessica!


[2013 update: You can't comment as an anonymous person anymore. Too many douchebags were leaving bullshit SPAM comments and my inbox was getting flooded, but if you're here to comment in a real way like a real person, go to it.]

Look at you commenting, that's fun.

So, here's the thing with commenting, unless you have an email address associated with your own profile, your comment will still post, but I won't have an email address with which to reply to you personally.

Sucks, right?

Anyway, to remedy this, I usually come back to my posts and post replies in the comment field with you.

But, if you ever want to email me directly to talk about pumpkins or shoes or what it's like to spend a good part of your day Swiffering - shoot me an email to finnyknitsATgmailDOTcom.