Wednesday, December 19, 2007

There is sometimes crafting amongst the bitching

I've spent a lot of time bemoaning the Fugly going on around my neighborhood this year, and believe me - there is more to come, but once in a while I've also been crafting.

I know, it seems like I wouldn't have the energy after all my bitching, but well, I do. Perhaps it is all my years of strenuous training?

You might remember the craftiness that I pulled off last year at the eleventh hour, running from house to house dragging Bubba behind me (to carry all the crafty stuff you know - he loves this) so that I could hang festive-ish holiday bundles of breads and jingly things from doorknobs of neighbors we knew by first name.

There were about, I don't know, half dozen of these first name having neighbors. So, the job of hanging went by pretty fast and we were back in the house to get all hermitted out in front of the fire where we belong.

To put it plainly, we (Bubba and I) are not "For Everyone". Much like the color orange, black licorice and snow camping is not "For Everyone". For some - we are a great match, they like our quirkiness and forgive/turn a blind eye to our incessant weirdness. For others - we are as unpalatable as the last sip of warm beer at the bottom of a backwashed bar glass. This is all fine with us, we know we're the only ones who can really stand Us.

But surprisingly, despite our Not For Everyone status, we managed to make nice with at least 7 additional neighbors this year. It is amazing the power of beer.

So, when I sat down to do my random holiday crafting/baking For the Neighbors, I realized we knew 7 more neighbors with first names. Wowza. We met people. This meant we went out of the house and used our words to interact with strangers who live close to our house. Who was watching our TV and holding down our couch or making sure the vegetables grew during all this neighbor meeting time??

Scares me to think about it.

Anyway, after the shock of our Year of Social Interaction wore off, I baked extra cookies and extra bread and made extra of these cute cone things with special adjustments to allow for jingly door hangingness and am about ready to put them all together for this weekend's walk through the neighborhood with Bubba for our annual (this will be year #2, so we can call it annual) festive-ish bringing of goods to doorknobs.

We will perhaps be sweating when we get done hanging these on 13 doors, but it will go faster when I can say, "Hey Bubb, can you hang this on Mike's door?" instead of, "Hey Bubb, can you hang this on the door of the house with the inflatable reindeer merry-go-round and broken rope lights that blink only on one end?"

Because, you know, I'm all about efficiency.


  1. You may as well have called this post "Steal This Idea" (even though I enjoyed your title more), because I will definitely be adding this to my mental file. Hanging the gifts on the neighbors doors! Genius! We only know about 5 of our neighbors, but not well enough that I want to stand there and make small talk whilst forking over some baked goods. This solves that problem nicely.

  2. Oh! Totally steal it! And then never have to actually talk to your neighbors again :) The best part is that they'll yell, "Thanks for the cookies (or whatever)" from their driveways and you can just be like, "Sure! Happy Holidays!" and you'll be, like, the best neighbor ever.

  3. Neighbors are to be feared and spied on! If you feed them they'll never go away!

  4. I like the idea of not having to stand there and make small talk when it's cold out (well, probably not too cold for you guys) when really you just wanna be generous and then be on your way.

    You should've shown a pic of one of these contraptions all loaded up with goodies! And then put it in a box and mailed it to me! ;-)

    Steven - you sound like Brett. He's SO not into meeting the neighbors. I actually left a small plate of cookies in the mailbox the other morning, and had a nice handwritten thank you note from our mail-lady!


[2013 update: You can't comment as an anonymous person anymore. Too many douchebags were leaving bullshit SPAM comments and my inbox was getting flooded, but if you're here to comment in a real way like a real person, go to it.]

Look at you commenting, that's fun.

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Sucks, right?

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But, if you ever want to email me directly to talk about pumpkins or shoes or what it's like to spend a good part of your day Swiffering - shoot me an email to finnyknitsATgmailDOTcom.