Tuesday, September 12, 2006

In time for fall. Officially.

It is now Tuesday, two days post-landscapey project completion, and I am just able to once again move my arms and legs through their full range of motion and hobble to the computer to raise my (our - hubby was a godsend) hands in triumph.

Let me just say that I knew that shoveling nearly 5 cubic yards of dirt and bark wasn't going to be easy, and that I'd anticipated being somewhat worse for wear, but I was not prepared for my patience to be just as tired and sore as my, say, shoulders and hamstrings.

So, imagine for a moment that you, yourself, have ordered 5 cubic yards of dirt and bark (no matter how unlikely this scenario might be), and you have your shovel and wheelbarrow at the ready for the scooping and hauling of your future yard. You have meticulously planned the timing and execution of your landscaping project and even have the plants, other materials, sprinklers and hubby in their proper positions awaiting installation or call for immediate rescue. What could go wrong? Try to imagine.

Now guess.

Oh yes, having your 5 cubic yards of (surprisingly) heavy dirt and bark dumped a half block from your house instead of in the driveway as ordered/confirmed/reconfirmed because the driver of said dumping vehicle is an impressively unmotivated hammerhead who has never heard of customer service, damsels in distress, bitches on fire, women scorned and the like. He has obviously never run into any of the "service"people who have crossed me in the past. Otherwise, he'd have known the poor judgment he was displaying for all of my neighborhood to see. But, I have plans to deal with him on a separate occasion.

And thanks to my fabulously generous and helpful neighbors, who came wandering over to our piles with their own wheelbarrows and shovels, we managed to properly relocate the stuff to my yard and driveway where it could be properly molded into mini-hillsides suitable for hosting my leafy birthday presents from hubby. From the photo above, it is hard to really see the trees, since they are still a little on the wee side, but maybe this will help:

Japanese Maple (Bloodgood) and some frisky grasses

Japanese Maple(Winter Flame) and some other frisky grasses

And, before you say anything about the sparse nature of the layout here, it is all by design. Really. I'm planning something of a natural-ish hillside, so will be adding more grasses and native-type plants to the burms as we go. It's something of a work in progress that doesn't have to be mowed.

Perhaps I'll post photos when it starts to fill in a little. So you can stop making fun of me. Like some of the non-helpful neighbors who didn't come over to help scoop the dirt. (And I know they have shovels.)

I am proud to say, though, that of the neighbors who did help, they each came by to proclaim the fabulousness of the yard makeover, despite it's obvious lack of vegetation and supreme disregard for the value of sod. Self-congratulatory pride? Perhaps. Nonetheless, I limped my way to each of their doorsteps on Sunday morning with containers of Thank You chocolate chip cookies and the most heartfelt gratitude I could muster while in every variety of muscle distress. Which actually benefited them since each of them took turns mocking my festive 49ers t-shirt, and I was unable to take a swing at a single one. Luckies!

And now, with front yard landscaping accomplished, we will turn our attentions to the woefully rickety backyard fence that will (hopefully) house our future dog(s). As you can see here, the current fence can't even restrain a simple rose bush. Oh no, this will not do. Not for the kind of hell beasts we plan to bring home.


  1. Wow! It looks amazing!
    I can't believe they dropped the stuff off anywhere but at your house. What a nightmare. I'd have packed up my wheelbarrow and cried...a lot.

  2. Seriously super impressed. I'm guessing those ag classes are paying off! Look at you go, you gardening maven!

  3. I've raised consumer complaining to a major art form and if this happened to me, I would have five yards of free landscaping materials.

  4. Caro - I kept repeating to myself, "There's no crying in landscaping..." while shuffling the wheelbarrows to and from the yard. In this case, I am very thankful for neighbors. Pantsless or no.

    AfricanKelli-I'm coming to devastate your yard this weekend! Prepare oneself for the onslaught of misguided plant advice.

    Steven- Yes, I too have taken some prizes in the "I demand satisfaction" games. My most cherished prize - an entire Jeep's worth of free groceries packed to the rafters by store employees who *forgot* to cook the Christmas dinner that I had preordered for a house of hungry Marines (in college - before my cooking days). It was a glorious time.


[2013 update: You can't comment as an anonymous person anymore. Too many douchebags were leaving bullshit SPAM comments and my inbox was getting flooded, but if you're here to comment in a real way like a real person, go to it.]

Look at you commenting, that's fun.

So, here's the thing with commenting, unless you have an email address associated with your own profile, your comment will still post, but I won't have an email address with which to reply to you personally.

Sucks, right?

Anyway, to remedy this, I usually come back to my posts and post replies in the comment field with you.

But, if you ever want to email me directly to talk about pumpkins or shoes or what it's like to spend a good part of your day Swiffering - shoot me an email to finnyknitsATgmailDOTcom.