Saturday, July 28, 2012

Just try not to be an asshole. That's all I'm saying.

So, you guys have some random ideas for me to cover over the last few posts before we hit 1,000.

And, I'm sure I'll half-assedly cover some of them, but I'm sorta keen to delve into another topic of great controversy because why not and all...


Yep, I said it. It's a big touchy DON'T GO THERE subject with everyone and, you know what, I'm just totally going there.

I'm four posts from 1,000 and I'm probably going to alienate the rest of you who haven't already been alienated by my other offensive posts when I tell you that I think that organized religion is bunk.

For me.

I do not embrace it.

That said - I know lots of good lovable people who totally DO embrace it and, you know what, I think that's fine, too.

And I think it's great that we live in a country where you can decide to embrace it or not embrace it and that's technically OK.

Sadly, much like the No Kids thing, saying that you don't believe in organized religion is also frowned upon and inspires many Askers of Why.

The part of it that gets me is that it's not that I'm saying that YOU or PEOPLE shouldn't believe in organized religion, I'm just saying that *I* don't.

I am not into organized religion.

Much in the same way that I'm not into NASCAR or MMA or golf or birding or the color pink or a million other things that *some* people get REALLY into - as though it's a religion. 

I'm not into those things.

And no one gives one fat rat's behind that I'm not into any of those other things that I'm totally not into.

People only seem to pipe up with their obnoxious WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOUs when I say that, although I was born into a Jewish household, I don't practice and I don't believe in God and I don't follow the teachings and avoid eating bacon or delicious lobster because a book says that it's a no-no.

It's just not what I believe. It's not what I'm about. Although I am a spiritual and curious person who seeks out enlightenment and some other usually-reserved-for-organized-religion types of activities, I don't go to church or synagogue and I don't believe in God.

I won't go into the whys and hows of why I don't embrace organized religion or believe in God because that's not the point. The point is that, much like the fact that I don't want kids and don't watch NASCAR and don't bow at the altar of Wal-Mart or wear head-to-toe pink - I don't do organized religion.

Are you offended that I'd lump Christianity or Judaism or Catholicism or Buddism in with NASCAR? Probably.

I imagine that might really bother some people.

And it bothers me that my ski season gets lumped in with Christmas and my fall honey harvest is lumped in with the Jewish high holidays.

Because snowboarding and beekeeping are two things that I *am* into and they are inextricably linked with these events in organized religion - something I *am not* into.

But, that all falls into the category of WHATEVER because, in my mind, we are not all here to be the same.

In my mind, the best thing I can do to contribute to my happiness and to the happiness of others as they go about their lives doing the things that they are into is for me to just try not to be an asshole.

That's basically as close as I get to religion - I try not to be an asshole to people and let them go about their lives in pursuit of happiness as I go about mine.

I guess my beef has to do with the fact that, for whatever reason, my not being into organized religion is an issue for other people. Even though those same people don't care that I'm not into NASCAR or Nickleback or reality TV or whatever.

Why is that?

Why care that I don't believe in one book that you've read but then not care that I don't believe in one TV show that you watch?

To me, that's a conundrum.

Not that I want these people getting on my back about whatever it is that I'm *not* doing that they think I *should* be doing, but it makes a godless heathen wonder.

Anyway, my solution to this is to give zero fucks and just go about my life trying to not be an asshole to people despite their Askings of Why and When and whatever that has to do with me not doing the things they think that I should be doing.

And for those of you who ARE into organized religion or NASCAR or beekeeping or birding or Nickelback or weaving your dog's hair into unitards for your other dogs - keep on keeping on, if it makes you happy and fulfilled.

Just do whatever the fuck makes you happy and, maybe, if you're into it, try not to be an asshole while you're at it.

That's all I'm saying.


Countdown goes to four posts and the next one I'm really answering your questions. All of them.

Should be interesting. Or at least really, really confusing.


  1. Not that anyone asked... But I like your attitude!

    Having been raised in an ├╝ber-religious environment (one which - BTW - I did NOT embrace "Lock Stock 'n Barrel!"), I have ultimately come to the conclusion that pretty-much ALL organized religions (Judeo-Christian, Buddhist, Wiccan/Pagan, Native American what-EVERS) are more-or-less pointing in the same ultimate direction ("Do unto others..." "Be a good person..." "Make a positive impact during this life..." yada-yada).

    To me, Organized Religion is kinda like having a "User's Manual" to get to whatever state of enlightenment we are ALL trying to achieve.

    Some of us actually *read* the User's Manual (with highlighter pen in-hand!). Others of us read the one-page fold-out "Quick-Start Guide." And the rest of us just sort of limp-along and find a way to make it work!

    Ultimately, we are all trying to head in the same direction and - as long as we are "living right" (IMHO withOUT casting judgement on others) and "doing right for others" that really is all that counts.........

    Thanks - yet again - for a "Bookmark-able" post! LOL

    Now - tell us about HOW you first got into Gardening?!!!

    1. Ooh, that's a good question! I will answer that one in the forthcoming very confusing post wherein I answer all questions.

  2. Replies
    1. I knew I couldn't be the only one. Kick ass.

  3. I almost thought it wasn't possible to like you even more than I do but this post has proved me wrong. You are very brave to speak your mind. I once was open about my "non-religon" but ended up having to move to a new neighborhood because of how people chose to take offense and then alienate my family. I tend to keep it more to myself nowadays but it's good to know there are others out there {it seems alot of earthy gardeners tend to have a similar philosophy}

    1. So much for 'Love Thy Neighbor', huh? The irony is what always gets me.

  4. Okay, I can understand most of this. But gosh, Walmart?

    I am a closet atheist. Only closeted because it would hurt my mom for no good reason.
    But next time someone asks me about my religion I will say, "I just try not to be an asshole."
    That says it all.

    1. We'll start a revolution of people who just try not to be assholes. Wouldn't that be funny?

      Beat these religious zealots at their own game.

  5. Spot on in regards to being a "non-believer" Finny (I always hate discussing religion, and having to justify why I *don't* believe in something), but how DARE you disparage Nickelback! Unforgivable that you haven't accepted them as your personal favorite. I'm sure if you gave me ten minutes of your time, I could persuade you. Or at least let me leave you with some literature...

    1. HaaaaaaaaaaHahahahahahahahaaaaaaa! on the literature :)

      I actually don't have much of a beef with Nickleback, but they're so polarizing, I thought I'd throw them in for good measure. People sure do hate those douches.

  6. I wish more people would subscribe to "don't be an asshole" as a personal credo. The world would be so much more pleasant.

  7. So, ah, you is Don't Be a Dick day.

  8. Oh dear, all I can do is pray for you to find God's goodness. (Yes, that's sarcasm.)

  9. This comment has been removed by the author.

  10. "...the best thing I can do to contribute to my happiness and to the happiness of others as they go about their lives doing the things that they are into is for me to just try not to be an asshole."

    My kind of faith. Love people who love what they love.


  11. The best discovery of the day was finding this blog. Was brought here by this link - & I am so glad I was. These are the things I discuss with my friends (Religion & the no kids thing), but lack the cojones to post on my blog.

    You're my new girl crush!


  12. When my kids were little, they would occassionally ask "what ARE we?" I told them we were members of the Be Nice and Be Fair club. I think that just about covers everything - and I thought if they went to school and proclaimed atheisism as their tribe, they would suffer retribution from the evangelicals and Mormons that populate our neck of the woods. Now that they're teenagers, I think they'll prefer "Don't Be an Asshole."

    There was a bit of religion in my youth and my husband was raised Catholic - so we both knew all the famous bible stories from Sunday school and catechism. My kids know NOTHING of that. My youngest son asked if he was going to be "vap-i-tized" and he liked to play with the "farmer and the boat" set when visiting my niece.

  13. "- I try not to be an asshole to people and let them go about their lives in pursuit of happiness as I go about mine."

    As someone who does believe in religion, but does not believe in evangelizing, I wish all people lived by the above statement.

    Carry on, Finny. Carry on.

  14. I think it is true that the "unguided tour" is way more interesting and enlightening.

  15. I, too, don't do organized religion. I do adhere to "try not to be an asshole" to those who deserve it... especially when they do something really, REALLY, stupid. It does get hard sometimes, though. ;0)

  16. Rock on, girlfriend! Somewhat of a closet athiest here, too. (I like that term). Closet in the sense that I don't apply the label to myself out loud in the company of others. Why? Because I read the papers. I see the polls. How reviled we athiests are in the eyes of the general public. I want to protect my kids.

    And as for why the religious give a fuck about why athiests don't believe in God? For one, many Christian faiths preach the necessity of spreading the word. You earn brownie points in heaven for making a convert. Triple points for athiests! For two, they feel terrible that you will go to hell. Because that's what Christianity teaches. So there is often a compassionate element to the interrogation, which makes it hard to be completely mad at them. (I still try!)

    I like your point about being inconvenienced by their holiday rituals. Too funny. Athiests have a lot of points that seldom get made (see my opening paragraph). I wish we could all feel free to stand in solidarity. Show those smug religious that we're a law-abiding, compassionate group of people.

  17. p.s. I am here courtesy of Another Day of Crazy. Thanks, ADoC!


[2013 update: You can't comment as an anonymous person anymore. Too many douchebags were leaving bullshit SPAM comments and my inbox was getting flooded, but if you're here to comment in a real way like a real person, go to it.]

Look at you commenting, that's fun.

So, here's the thing with commenting, unless you have an email address associated with your own profile, your comment will still post, but I won't have an email address with which to reply to you personally.

Sucks, right?

Anyway, to remedy this, I usually come back to my posts and post replies in the comment field with you.

But, if you ever want to email me directly to talk about pumpkins or shoes or what it's like to spend a good part of your day Swiffering - shoot me an email to finnyknitsATgmailDOTcom.