Wednesday, May 14, 2008

It's official

Last year by this time I had separated myself from my better judgment long enough to sign up for and begin officially training for my first ever half marathon oh my gawd.

This year by this time (read: today) I have been unofficially training for my second ever half marathon oh my gawd by trying to kill myself with nine+ mile runs having not even signed up for the race because I'm such a fucking wuss.

What if I don't have another one in me? Remember how I thought I'd made a terrible mistake when I was dying at mile 10? What if turning 30 cripples my running abilities and I make a big horrible messy shame of myself in front of all those people and Bubba and the dog?


Well, I don't know what then, but we'll have a fun time finding out because I finally sacked up and registered for the race.

Thankfully the folks at Elite Racing know how little it takes to motivate my finger into clicking and finally just decided to speak my language. Which is to say that they stopped sending me gentle reminders to Hurry! Sign up today for the San Jose Rock 'N Roll Half Marathon in October 2008! and everything and finally sent out the Hurry! Save $15 on registration for the San Jose Rock 'N Roll Half Marathon in October 2008 today with this code! email.

Um, people, save me the hemming and embarrassing hawing next year and just send out the fucking code in January so that I can not beat myself up for five months going maybe I will run it, maybe I won't run it, maybe I'll take up lawn bowling, maybe I'll just pretend I don't own running shoes. OK? K.

Because running my very technical training schedule when I'm not officially training for any race is just stupid. I mean, why am I spending hour(s) away from my comfy bed and husband by running early on Saturday mornings when there's no official reason for me to do so? It's hard for me to understand and I'm ME - so imagine how hard this is to explain to the nice man who hooks my underpants with this forefinger when I start to roll out of bed at 7am on Saturdays?

It is, apparently, quite hard for that man to understand. And for the record, that man is Bubba and he makes a very sad face when I tell him that I'm going running and please stop pulling on that string because it's doing mean things to my lady parts.

It's heartbreaking really.

So - this is why it's necessary for me to either sign up for the race or begin sleeping in with reckless abandon because the way I'm living right now is sort of inexplicable and causing strife in the household.

And so I signed up for the race. Finally. Which means this Saturday I will have a real reason to be out trying to kill myself with a nine mile run and wouldn't you know it, Bubba is out of the country so won't even be there to appreciate my real reason when he's trying to drag me back into bed by my whale tail.

Too much?

Oh well. I'm official baby!


  1. Oh my god. I read your posts about running and I have to laugh and then I also feel like killing myself/chucking in the towel on my new running thing because my lame 38 year-old ass is having trouble running 4 minutes straight then walking 2 for 3 whole miles. 13 MILES??????????? I can just imagine myself losing my bowels or something like some woman I saw in the nY marathon when I was like, 8,which has been burned on my brain every since and subsequently made me have a feel of shitting my pants when I run. Woo! Anyway, good luck with the training and think of this New Runner when I'm TRYING NOT TO WALK through my very first 5K on June 14th.

  2. Dude, I can't believe I hadn't heard 'whale tail' before. You're always a wealth of information.

    I haven't even put my seeds in the ground yet. And I don't even own a pair of running shoes. I suck.


[2013 update: You can't comment as an anonymous person anymore. Too many douchebags were leaving bullshit SPAM comments and my inbox was getting flooded, but if you're here to comment in a real way like a real person, go to it.]

Look at you commenting, that's fun.

So, here's the thing with commenting, unless you have an email address associated with your own profile, your comment will still post, but I won't have an email address with which to reply to you personally.

Sucks, right?

Anyway, to remedy this, I usually come back to my posts and post replies in the comment field with you.

But, if you ever want to email me directly to talk about pumpkins or shoes or what it's like to spend a good part of your day Swiffering - shoot me an email to finnyknitsATgmailDOTcom.