However, as a surprise to all, we have not yet been murdered in any of our shitbag MO-tels.
And let me tell you, they are the MO-telliest of Motels.
Well, one was an "Inn" but you know that just means "Shitbag Motel Where You Will NOT Be Walking Barefoot Even In The Shower. And Especially Not In The Shower."
Last night, when arriving at the MO-tel after his 107 mile bike ride, Bubba took one look around the grounds and into our room and broke into an updated-to-suit-the-situation version of Phil Collins' Sudio and changed the refrain to, "Su-su-sucio", which has had us laughing through gritted teeth for the last 24 hours.
For those of you non-Spanish speakers of the world, "sucio" means dirty.
And OH is this place suciO.
SuciO and bizarreO and hauntedO and creepyO and full of gangstasO and probably the scene of many crimesO and the current hand off point for a local gun running ringO - we're pretty sure.
If one hundred whores haven't met their end in this very room, I'd be shocked.
At least it is mostly full of transient cyclists from the ride and out of town contractors with bad taste in booze.
|They still MAKE Mickey 40s?|
|If any place were going to be haunted AND the scene of many homicides, this is the place.|
|How very sKEEnic.|
|Their farm dog toured me through the place. She is THE MOST.|
|The chickens had no desire to cuddle. Just peck. Still - cute.|
|Lots of cute baby goats to cuddle though.|
|Way too munchy to cuddle.|
|Cuddliest creature of them all!|
|Is he a frog? Is he a coral snake? Is he a bright shiny ass kicker? Who can tell.|
- Get the FUCK out of this MO-tel of Horrors
- Taste some of Justin Vineyards' best
- Sample some of Pasolivo's finest
- Check into a less skeevey MO-tell (it's an "Inn", so we'll see)
- Eat some delicious din-din