Monday, September 02, 2013

Another gratifying post for people who think blogs are just full of stupid shit.

While some may consider my entire blog to be full of posts like this, I do not. However, this post most assuredly fits into the Why The Fuck Does Anyone Bother category, which I happen to know that you people like.

YOU people. 

I really like it when people use the grand and wide sweeping "YOU", by the way. Because it both brings together and alienates people at the same time. It's controversial. SOME people hate it a lot and they get all mad. All of these features appeal to me. Just thought I'd share that with you since we've already decided that this post is going to be full of stupid useless shit anyway. 

For the main stupid useless shit topic of this post though - casters.

Yeah, like little free-swiveling wheels that turn awkward and heavy objects into movable, useful, way better versions of themselves automatically.

Take The Cube, for instance.

He ain't fancy, but Awesome doesn't require fancy.

You should first know that we love The Cube. It's the most useful piece of furniture (indoors or outdoors) that we own, we've had it since before Bubba and I were a thing and, in its time, it has served one million purposes, such as:

1. Throw a tablecloth over it and it becomes a Patio Bar
2. and a Patio Side Table
3. Add a cushion to that and it becomes an extra seat
4. Take the cushion away and it becomes a reception table
5. Denude it completely and it becomes a bike repair stand
6. Brewing table
7. Painting table
8. Lock the wheels and it becomes a step stool
9. Unlock the wheels and it easily moves big heavy things
10. Speaker box
1,000,000. Extra seat in the garage for lazy wives

What I'm saying is that if this thing, which is just six pieces of particle board nailed together into a big ass box, was just a box without wheels, it'd be mostly useless and we'd have destroyed/gotten rid of it years ago. 

But because it has wheels STRIKE THAT locking casters - it's the most useful piece of furniture that we own.

And that fact - that putting wheels on something otherwise useless and annoying makes it super useful and The Best - has influenced our household. In the way that we now consider the Caster Factor before we sell/toss/burn any piece of furniture or other rigid thing.

What Would Casters Do?

Well, let me tell you:
Metal box into Paint Cart

Tool Box into Tool Box That's Not Always In The Wrong Place ALL THE FUCKING TIME

Five huge storage totes that are impossible to get into INTO Five huge storage totes that are easily accessible

Giant wooden crate for VW parts that's ALWAYS in the way INTO Giant wooden crate for VW parts that's ALWAYS in the way but at least marginally easy to relocate to some less in the way place.

Metal desk that can be anywhere, any time, any way you like it.  We also love The Desk very much.

And the fact that The Cube fits neatly under The Desk makes the whole situation that much more enjoyable/bloggable. 


I'd like to be able to say that when we brought home this metal desk, we tested The Cube to see whether it'd fit under it, but alas, we did not have that kind of forethought. HOWEVER, when Bubba built the leg extensions with the casters for The Desk and then we slid The Cube underneath it, thus discovering the next layer of Awesome lurking in The Cube's repertoire, I can say that we weren't surprised.

It is The Cube after all. He only knows Awesome. And casters.

That's all I got.


  1. One person´s stupid shit is another person´s entertaining shit. The power of the Internet. And a good writer who can make casters fun to read about.

    1. Just imagine if I had casters! I'd be an unstoppable force. Or just ready to move out of the way...

  2. I feel like this box and caster thing is bordering on fetish, and I'm starting to feel a little uncomfortable here.


[2013 update: You can't comment as an anonymous person anymore. Too many douchebags were leaving bullshit SPAM comments and my inbox was getting flooded, but if you're here to comment in a real way like a real person, go to it.]

Look at you commenting, that's fun.

So, here's the thing with commenting, unless you have an email address associated with your own profile, your comment will still post, but I won't have an email address with which to reply to you personally.

Sucks, right?

Anyway, to remedy this, I usually come back to my posts and post replies in the comment field with you.

But, if you ever want to email me directly to talk about pumpkins or shoes or what it's like to spend a good part of your day Swiffering - shoot me an email to finnyknitsATgmailDOTcom.