Yard fashion. Don't you call it pointless.

During a recent Goodwill purge, I finally gave away all the old and oversized Tshirts I'd been hoarding for no other reason than I had some absurd attatchment to their sentiment, logo, midwestern girl's bowling team of which I was not a member or otherwise.

I held on to them all for a long time, I guess under the assumption that one day I'd enjoy wearing unflatteringly large hot pink Tshirts advertising the Pink Lady Bowlers or that maybe Bubba would develop a festish for red XL tshirts proclaiming Wellman Family Farms as the pig farm of rural Indiana. 

Sure, that *could* happen, but I needed the drawer space for shirts that actually fit me and also proclaimed sentiments in which I believed. So, I Goodwilled the big sack of shirts and, after refolding everything in the drawer, realized I didn't have room for anything new but *could* now shut the drawer without having to do that hold everything down by force while sliding the drawer closed and almost slamming your hand in there thing. 

Good times. Tshirt issue resolved.

Then we did AIDS Walk and some nice woman from another team who I will not refer to by name snuck extra XL tshirts into our team's box to "thank us" for an unspecified reason which I do believe was "for taking some of these shirts so I don't have to carry them to the car."

Hey! Thanks lady! Next year you may find a folding table in your purse. As a token of our esteem, of course. Beotch.

Hey, no one said you had to be nice in order to raise money for a worthy cause. 

ANYWAY.

I've had this blue XL Tshirt with its logo so suspiciously similar to one our team has historically used BUT WHATEVER hanging out on the craft shelf for some time, awaiting its final form which would for sure not be that of an XL Tshirt. 

On comparison, it seemed that this Tshirt was a skoshe large for me.

Because who wears an XL Tshirt, I ask you, and also how come no one's ever off-loading Tshirts in a women's medium, for instance? And then, what the F am I going to do with this big ass shirt?

Ah, and then entered The Answer in the form of this CRAFT: blog post tutorial.

Make a cute draped neck top from a fugly too-big Tshirt? Yes, please.

Of course, there's nothing in the tutorial about wait two months and THEN make the top, but that's what happened until last weekend when I realized it was now or never because October is a big mess and BAM: New draped neck top for moi.

Future Tshirt abandoners: I wear a women's medium.

Now, yes, I should have cut the back of the top from the FRONT of the Tshirt so that I'd have had enough room to cut the front from the plain BACK of the Tshirt to avoid including the plagaristic logo, but well, sometimes these things happen and you end up with some random shit on your chest.

WOW. Moving on...

I was pretty excited about this little craft that turned a useless giant Tshirt into a cute casual top for $0 until Bubba asked me where I was going to wear it and I said oh, like to work in the yard or something and he rolled his eyes right at me because I'd just spent an hour making a yardwork shirt when he could have just reached into the easy shutting drawer and found one for me BUT WHATEVER. 

This is not about efficiency in yard attire, people, it's about yard fashion. I mean, how fun will it be to put this shirt on with my sorta worn-in yard jeans and go out to prune the lavender?

FUN.

Anyway, if you've not yet shuffled all your big useless Tshirts off to the Goodwill, maybe you want some fancy yard fashion, too. Then we can all prance around with our pruning shears looking way hotter than those other yard whores in their ratty too big tshirts who are not sexy at all.

Because thinking you look hot when you really don't is all the rage in household delusion these days.